You Know Nothing About the Moon

Posted on August 21, 2016 by Brad Oates

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

I got a strange phone call the other day. A friend of mine phoned to point out that he could see both the sun and the moon in the sky at the same time.

Certainly, there was nothing unusual about this other than his desire to call and tell me about it. But—he then pointed out—the moon had a shadow on it.

He didn’t need to say anything more; I saw the problem immediately.

All my young life, I’d grown up with the simple understanding that the dark spot or ‘shadow’ on the moon was caused by the Earth blocking out some of the light from the sun—essentially throwing its own shadow across the moon and hiding part of it from our sight.

I remembered—I was certain—elementary school teachers explaining this concept to us in great detail—likely using plasticine models, and perhaps a flashlight. It was, at any rate, a scientific ‘fact’ I had taken as sacrosanct my entire life.

In that one phone call, the idea was demolished entirely.

If I could see both the sun and the moon, that meant the sun had a direct line to the moon—unobstructed by the selfish machinations of the Earth. Therefore, the shadow across the surface of the moon could not possibly be caused by the Earth, as I had always understood.

Suddenly, everything I thought I had known about the lunar cycle was in shambles. This may seem like a small loss to anyone who gives even an average amount of consideration to the nature of celestial bodies, but I have a particular affinity for the sanctity of knowledge, and I found it quite troubling indeed.

Immediately, I set off to correct my false understandings and learn the truth about this now mysterious phenomenon. It took no time at all, and my understandings were soon corrected to incorporate this newfound information,. But I was nevertheless left with an unpleasant taste in my mouth.

Asking around over the following weeks, I soon discovered—to my small comfort—that I was far from alone in my naïve misunderstandings—in fact, I could scarcely find any other person who knew the truth about how the lunar cycles worked.

Do you?

No, probably not.

But you thought you did.

Most everyone I talked to thought the shadows on the moon were created by the Earth—just as I had so very recently. Simple fools!

The truth is, you see, that the dark spot on the moon is caused not by the Earth, but by the moon itself. Depending on the moon’s position relative to the sun, one half of it will always be fully lit (the side facing the sun), and one half will be dark (the side opposite the sun). The lunar cycle we witness is a product of the angle at which we view it. If the Earth is between the sun and moon, we will look back at it and see it fully illuminated. If the Earth is behind the sun and moon, we will see little of it, as we look towards its unlit side.

Finally, it the moon is somewhere between those extremes, we will see part of its illuminated side, and part of its dark side—as was the case on the day in question. (Source).

Once again, the function of the lunar cycle made sense. The world was right again.

…or was it?

No. Not quite. In the end, I was left questioning far more than just the moon. I’d been so confidant in this understanding. In fact, I would have likely gone so far as to say I ‘knew’ how it all worked. How then could I now remain confident in anything else I thought I knew, upon learning firsthand the fleeting transience of my knowledge?

It made me think of the nature of knowledge itself, and how much of what we claim to know is truly only suspected, or worse still, believed. It spoke to me of information bias and the ubiquity with which we cling to false truths.

Socrates once asked, “Can we ever truly ‘know’ anything?”

No, I suppose we cannot.

-Brad OH Inc.

The Brad OH Inc. Happy Times Children’s Blog Post

Posted on August 14, 2016 by Brad Oates

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

I’m afraid I must apologize in advance. I don’t have any cute cat pictures to share with you, nor will I be indulging in any hilarious memes. I have little talent for the sort of viral content which is so popular these days—I find myself grounded in my age, and can offer little in the way of contemporary distraction.

But that’s not the only apology due to you, and that is in fact precisely the purpose of this article. Certainly, you have a great deal to entertain you—the myriad distractions and novelties provided for you surpass by far the offerings of any generation prior. Sadly, you may grow to find that dependence on such toys often stands in the way of imagination—that lauded gift given to you by birthright and discouraged by reality. Do not let it wither within you—for the future depends upon the imagination, hope, and problem solving skills of your generation.

We welcome you to this world with open arms and sagging spirits—excited for your arrival at the same time we are shamed by the condition of the world we present.

Fear, distrust, and desperation are the leitmotifs of our present day. The distractions you will be subjected to have already taken their toll on us, and the failures of my generation will be the chief inheritance of your own.

The deceptions you face will inevitably be even stronger than those which sundered us from decency and good sense. You will be tempted by greed, misguided by vice, placated by contentment, and pacified by placebos—a constant stream of assurances that if you bury your head in the sand and allow time to slip by, everything will be ok in the end.

Of course, that is not the case.

It’s not an enviable situation we leave to you, and that is the reason for our apology here today. But with it, I offer something else, and that is encouragement. Perhaps a challenge even, for I expect you will find that far more enticing.

Be better than us. Expect more—not for yourself, but from yourself and all others as well. Demand that your generation rises to the incredible potential it holds in secret, and refuse to accept anything less than the beauty of which you are inherently capable. Pursue science, and knowledge, and faith, and justice. Do not blindly accept the systems around you, or fail to seek answers where there is doubt. Question all, and where you find the accepted answers do not satisfy you, question further still.

Find new answers—or create them. Evaluate what you have, challenge what you’re told, and never settle for less than you are capable. Change systems, laugh loudly, and tear down political structures which are meant not for your benefit but your containment.

Scream, bang walls, and rage like only youth can. Get in the faces of your elders and show them that you can do better—remind them of the truths you take as sacrosanct—which they have long forgotten. Be better than us—it will be a shame which we can happily bear in our twilight years, watching with unbridled pride as our failures are buried in history and your victories shine all the brighter for the difficulty through which they were achieved.

And through it all of course, remember to have fun.

-Brad OH Inc.

It is Good

Posted on August 7, 2016 by Brad Oates

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

It is good to think of ourselves as guests in this world. For that is surely what we are. We come, and we go. What we leave behind is for the next guests to live with…for a while.

I write a lot about fundamental virtues, and the dignity which is shared by all people and all creeds. For those few who would actively deny that basic human decency, this article is not for you.

To skirt all tangential esoteric questioning, we are here for a while, and then we die. The world goes on.

The situation we are born into is a geographic lottery, and we spend our short time dealing with the choices of thousands of generations of guests before us.

Our actions will affect all those to come.

As such, the assumptions we make and the expectations we hold should hardly be different from our attitude towards being a guest in the house of a friend or colleague.

A guest should not take more than they need, and never without asking. A guest should help out in any way they can. A guest should not cause any undo harm or damage, and a guest should leave things exactly as they find them.

It’s all just good sense, social intelligence, and common respect in the small scale scenario of visiting the home of a friend or colleague, and the grander stage of global interdependency should not obscure this view.

Just as we would not pillage the pantries of our hosts and leave them in want, neither can we allow our society to deny the potential of our skills and resources to nations or people with less. Likewise, just as it would be obscene to deface or destroy a home we are welcomed into, so too is it beneath us to take any action that might ruin this planet we enjoy so briefly, leaving it barren for the generations to come.

To do either would be violence most bestial, with or without gunfire.

It is an easy enough philosophy to nod your head to, but we must now explore the implications. To take no more than what we need, and leave things as they are, many would find themselves no longer the fortunate inheritors of land, wealth, and privilege which the circumstances of their birth have so far afforded. All would need an equal share—and none could be so bold as to demand more. Food, shelter, healthcare, and freedom would be the inherent birthright of all humanity, and the bettering of this shared condition—and its sustainability for future generations—would be the ambition and passion of all.

It’s good to show respect for our host. Our time, our place, and our ability to contribute are irreplaceable commodities which we cannot afford to squander on vanity and entitlement. For a thankless guest soon finds herself with nowhere else to go.

It is good to know these things.

-Brad OH Inc.

#TrumpetBlowers

Posted on July 24, 2016 by Brad Oates

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

‘Hell is on the way!’ promised Tom Cotton from the floor of the Republican National Convention on July 18^th, and the crowd went wild.

At least that’s what I’d thought he said…both times he said it. Searching through the transcript of his speech later proved he may have said ‘help’ rather than ‘hell’, but this difference in letters actually changes the overall sentiment very little.

The entire event was marked by a stark and severe sense of doom and gloom—fear mongering and the proselytizing of ‘American Values’—this hollow insistence that America is some elite champion of decency, which entirely misses the point that it has been the quintessentially American values of greed, intolerance, and contempt which have brought the world to this crossroads to begin with.

This was most clearly evidenced in the fast-shifting campaign slogan of ‘the Drumph’—which is now moving from the primary-race call of ‘Make America Great Again’, to the somewhat more sinister ‘Make America Safe Again’.

By playing upon the deep-rooted fears of a nation balancing on the razor’s edge, the Republican party hopes to garner sufficient support not to push the nation to either side of this precarious divide, but rather straight down upon it—eviscerating any lingering sense of hope and decency it has left.

And all of this done to the music of Queen? The irony is nearly blasphemous!

But that would not be the only Biblical-bastardization of the evening—not by a long shot.

The entire night was punctuated by a constant stream of victim-blaming and heinous vitriol—‘don’t pause, don’t think—get mad’, was the general mood, and with each speaker to take the podium, the atmosphere grew more and more apocalyptic.

The lunacy would not stop, and seemed at all times to be building towards some terrible crescendo—like harbingers of doom proclaiming the final need for desperate and hateful acts—the speakers served as the eager Trumpet Blowers for an Armageddon of their own devise.

The ‘Trumpet’ himself made only the briefest of appearances.

-Brad OH Inc.

Lutra Lutra’s- ‘Lutra Lutra’

Posted on June 26, 2016 by Brad Oates

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

On July 1^st, 2016, Filthy McNasty’s will be hosting ‘Oh Can of Beer’ (Link), the CD Release party for Lutra Lutra’s self-titled debut EP.

Lutra Lutra is an Edmonton, AB based band whose members include Garreth Burrows (Vocals and Guitar), Katrina Burrows (Keys and Vocals), Will Smith (Bass) and Denis Frigon (Drums). Relatively new to the Edmonton music scene, the group has already put on some stellar local shows (Link), but July 1^st will mark the official release of their debut album—giving attendees a chance to pick up this impressive EP while enjoying some drinks and hearing Lutra Lutra perform live.

What better time, then, for Brad OH Inc. to take a serious look at just what this EP has to offer with an official review?

Lutra Lutra’s ‘Lutra Lutra’

The ‘Lutra Lutra’ EP consists of six songs, and clocks in at just over 17 minutes. It’s a brief taste of the band’s potential to be sure, and the fact that of these six songs, two of them (the Intro and Interlude) are primarily musical numbers can tell us a good deal about the brash and independent vision of this unique Edmonton menagerie.

Grounded in an upbeat and addictive rhythm section, Lutra Lutra excels at creating brief but compelling tracks, as memorable for their precise musicianship as their impeccable sense of lyricism and wit. In fact, for this writer, the lyrics were a special stand-out—bringing a near-literary vibe to the EP sorely lacking in so much contemporary music.

Adding this promising foundation to Katrina Burrows’ classical keyboarding and the Burrows siblings potent harmonizing makes for an especially unique musical journey which ends sooner than we would like, but certainly leaves us clamouring for more.

To get a better understanding of what’s on offer, let’s take a look at the track-list:

1) Intro-

The album starts off with a gentle, melodious intro which sets a patient tone for the album. Katrina sings wordlessly over a slow keyboard section, which soon cuts into the first full track, and lead single of the album.

2) Fall Out of Love (F.O.O.L)-

The EP’s lead single, ‘F.O.O.L.’ kicks into high gear right out of the gate, taking us straight into its churning guitars to create an immediate sense of urgency. Garreth’s lyrics are punctuated with a double beat of the drums by Denis Frigon in a cunning serve-and-return, creating an effective sense of tension and payoff. With a powerful chorus, an impressive guitar-based bridge by former band member Cody Willets, and consistent harmonizing by the Burrows siblings throughout, the song delivers an impactful introduction to the band’s charm and talent. If this lead single was the best the EP had to offer, it would remain a satisfying debut, but that title is called into question as soon as the next song.

3) Miser Remedy-

Katrina starts off the vocals of this song attended by a simple drum beat. Upon setting this gentle tone, she is soon joined by Garreth as the song picks up its pace and flows smoothly into a desperation-laden chorus by Garreth, who pleads to the ether for deliverance and direction. This song is especially notable for its gorgeous lyrics, including gems such as ‘The Queens are gone but the Kings are still shuffling’, and ‘We all go to bed, in our own disguise’.

The chorus itself introduces the important motifs of light and hope, as Garreth assures some unknown and possibly unattainable salvation, ‘You could shine a light, when all my thoughts are faded in the darkest of night’. This theme will be revisited later on.

4) Interlude-

Following the stunning ‘Miser Remedy’, we are treated to a brief musical interlude. This track offers the jaunty playfulness of a 70’s spy movie, teasing us with its increasing complexity while assuring the listener that it’s brief appearance is not for nothing. Throughout, the track functions as a countdown—a Rube-Goldberg metronome ticking down to the next song.

The sensation pays off as expected, and after a quick guitar bridge, we’re straight into ‘Culture and Wine’.

5) Culture and Wine-

‘Culture and Wine’ is a tour-de-force of cheeky lyrics and chugging rhythm. The rapid-fire lyrics are a non-stop showcase of the band’s laudable vocabulary and razor-sharp wit, including marvels like: ‘You’ve got your dignity, I missed the irony, that your soliloquy was blurted aloud’ and ‘Don’t be afraid, you’re strength of argument is only contradicted when you vent’. This one was a bit frustrating for me as a writer, as the onrush of intriguing turns-of-phrase left me pondering the depths of one as the next one breezed right past.

The song has no shortage of charisma, and a shockingly groovy bass-bridge by Will Smith only punctuates the point. This penultimate track certainly sets a high bar for the closer.

6) What We’ve Lost-

As the final track of Lutra Lutra’s debut EP, ‘What We’ve Lost’ doesn’t disappoint. This one opens with vocals by Katrina, setting a mood of dissonance and uncertainty before being joined by Garreth for a harmony which brings back the theme of light. We are assured that despite the desperation of their situation, there is hope for better. But we aren’t offered directions to get there; instead this song is a reflection on what has led us to this point, and how experience can corrode our youthful expectations.

The lyrics are stellar throughout—from Garreth’s cocky refrain of ‘I’ve got impeccable timing…’, which is followed immediately by a drumline to drive home his point, to verses written perhaps as an intentional affront to the peace-of-mind of this blissfully listless generation. Garreth later laments: ‘By what I’ve seen so far I’ve lowered expectations, full marks from my heart if you’ve escaped your parent’s basement’.

Poignant stuff no doubt, but these are soon followed by a set which left everyone here at Brad OH Inc. twitching with doubt: ‘Now we’re drowning in the deep end, while you’re looking for a new trend, of thinking up a title in order to sound vital so upon the stock market crash, you won’t need your bible’. These are the sort of insidious and seditious lyrics that make us want to sit down for a few beers and a long talk with lyricist Garreth Burrows—if for no other reason than to ensure he’s no philosophic threat to the hallowed Corporate tenets of Brad OH Inc.

…This is a powerful song about loss and potential which demonstrates admirable introspection from the nascent band. They manage at once to contemplate their past and purpose, while struggling with the dissonant knowledge of their own place and privilege. In the end, it’s a lament for our more childish hopes for what the world could have been, in the face of what it really is.

When the album finishes, one cannot help but wish it were longer. If the brief 17 minutes were marked with an undeniable sense of swagger, they were also entirely bereft of posturing. To the band’s great credit, they exude a sense of soul-searching sincerity, and the more introspective moments of the disc flow into one another with no prescribed intent beyond self-examination and direct expression. There is no deception here, just clear provocation and articulate reflection. We can ask little more of any band, and might usually expect far less from a debut effort.

Lutra Lutra’s self-titled EP is an impressive debut, and deserves a place on the shelf of any ardent music fan eager to explore emerging new talents. But don’t take our word for it—get out to the Lutra Lutra EP release party (Link) on July 1^st at Filthy McNasty’s to see the band live, and grab a copy for yourself!

-Brad OH Inc.

The Final Facet of Globalization

Posted on June 19, 2016 by Brad Oates

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

This world of ours is globalized (Link) to an incredible degree. With every increase in technology, we have observed exponential growth in the level of interconnection and access afforded to nearly all of the world’s inhabitants. The internet alone serves an unbelievable role in making the world a truly global society—allowing the instantaneous sharing of information which would previously have taken weeks, or even months.

Planes, trains, and automobiles have provided the means to efficiently move physical resources around the globe—meaning that formerly exotic commodities can now be found as easily as a trip to your local grocery store. Science as well has played a pivotal role here—advances in refrigeration, preservation, genetic modifications, and more have helped us share the bounty of this world far and wide…for those capable of paying for it.

As a result of this process, leading nations draw labour, resources, and wealth from the poorest nations in the world, always at offset values. By outsourcing easy labour jobs to nations with lower (Read: dismal) minimum wages and few to no laws protecting workers, Corporations have managed to increase their output, up their profit margins, and generally thrive in a relationship which can scarcely be described as anything short of parasitic.

Yes, for every gain there is a cost, and despite the progress made, it would seem that the one big concept which nations have refused to show any global regard for is that of human rights and minimal standards of living.

In a world with sufficient resources and scientific knowledge to keep everyone fed and healthy, the fact that one woman may drive a million dollar car while a child elsewhere does without a 5 cent pill is entirely unacceptable. In fact, it’s downright despicable.

The exchange is rather one-sided to say the least—and year after year we may observe new wars started, new sanctions imposed, new government-facilitated coups to install more ‘cooperative’ leaders, and other such heinous acts all in the name of increasing the profit margins of large-scale Corporations. Human rights violations in much of the world are ubiquitous; from the factories which provide us our clothing, to the plantations which grow our food.

Of all the resources and technologies we have managed to import and export on a global scale—it would seem the most obvious and easily renewed is yet to meet that lauded status; specifically, I’m referring to empathy.

The atrocities which are committed in the name of profit are the inevitable result of a system which treats empathy with the same cavalier and disposable attitude we reserve for so many other resources. But this view of empathy as a resource is rather telling—for if it is to be viewed as a resource, then it is essential that we recognize it as a wholly renewable resource. As such, caring for others and striving for a new global best is not a zero-sum game in which everyone is competing for limited supplies and the gains of one must be the losses of another. No, the truth is that the gains of one may be shared unilaterally, and if one society flourishes, this should—and must—benefit everyone involved.

But this is rarely the case. We import resources from around the world and utilize the cheap labour available, but what are we offering in return? The most common answer is that we act as a force of freedom, democracy, or protection for the rest of the world—but this claim is entirely indefensible for even the simplest mind with the vaguest understanding of global politics (Link). To glean all the potentially beneficial resources from a nation yet contribute nothing to it in return is not a globally beneficial system, but rather something more akin to an exploitative, imperial domination.

As it stands, misery and despair are the most evident exports of the so-called first world.

When we deal in such unjust ways, we may be importing more than we bargain for. We’ve defined ourselves with callous disinterest and self-serving malice abroad, and now the chickens come home to roost. International resentment is growing at all times, and even the local populace is losing faith in its leadership and stirring under an ever increasing sense of anxiety and civil unrest.

So perhaps this whole arrangement needs to be revisited. Trade and grow we must, but if we continue to do so with such a total lack of regard for human decency, we will come to find that our imports tend to reflect our exports in a far more sinister manner than we anticipated.

No other outcome is possible—that’s just the nature of the deal. When we short change our trade partners on a regular basis, we soon find ourselves cut out of the loop entirely. Fair trade must be fair in all senses. Financial growth must mean human liberty, and for every measure of progress in science, technology, and resource access, there must—in any civil society—be a commiserate gain in compassion, kindness and equality.

The change needed cannot be more evident—we must make the imperative shift into a trade relationship based on equity, empathy, sustainability, and virtue. Empathy—this key renewable resource, must become a staple export of our society—an example of decency and righteousness used to set the standard not only around the world, but at home as well. Until we make this crucial change, and plant the seeds of charity and kindness abroad, we can never honestly hope to reap them at home.

-Brad OH Inc.

A Brief Ode to Baseball

Posted on June 12, 2016 by Brad Oates

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

Bases and bunts and broken bats,

Bullpens and secret tips of the hat.

Backstops and breaking balls,

And charging the mound after dubious calls.

Check swings, switching up, and clutch hits,

Cut offs, steals, and foul tips.

Dugouts, cleats, and walk-off hits,

Grand slams, tag ups and catcher’s mitts.

Diving grabs and 3-run shots,

Home plate and the batter’s box.

Pitching duels and pennant races,

Pinch runners and shifting places.

Mounds and moonshots and make-up calls,

Money pitches or base on balls.

Errors and bloopers and hard line drives,

Breaking up plays with illegal slides.

Cutters and sliders and throwing the heat,

South paws and road trips and records to beat.

Strikeouts and tag-ups and tough one hoppers,

Infield rookies racing for choppers.

Aces and shutouts and defending the title,

Manufacturing runs and hitting the cycle.

Pitching relief, close or starter,

Young boys with posters of Joe Carter.

Pick off throws and Double plays,

And crowds all chanting ‘Let’s go Jays’.

-Brad OH Inc.

Are Humans Really Great Apes?

Posted on May 29, 2016 by Brad Oates

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

Scientific taxonomy classifies human beings within the family of hominidae, more commonly known as the ‘Great Apes’. We share this taxonomic family with three other genera, members of which include the orangutans, gorillas, and chimpanzees—all fine and majestic animals to be sure (Link).

Each of these creatures have found their niche within their local eco-systems, and have lived in a relatively balanced natural state for generations uncounted. They consume the resources available, and are consumed by the predators which are capable of doing so. They live within their means, and display a general civility to one another aside from occasional competitions over mates and territory. Meanwhile, the homo sapiens, or ‘humans’, have for the entirety of recorded history been putting on a childish display of wanton consumption and heedless destruction. If we are honest with ourselves, we must admit that this begs a pretty important question: are Humans really ‘Great’ apes?

All things considered, we’ve had our fair share of positive moments. We’ve built some incredible structures, and solved puzzles that would leave the rest of the apes scratching their furry little skulls in abject bewilderment. We’ve spread our population far and wide, and survived countless changes to the world we live in. At the very least then, we may certainly be considered alright apes.

Of course, most of the cataclysmic challenges through which we have persevered have been our own doing. We have an incredible and unparalleled ability to intellectualize our world and use ration to consider the effects of our actions. Still, we have managed to destroy much of our ecosystem, and of the many wonders we have achieved, few have been able to endure. So in truth, perhaps we are really just ok apes.

It’s true that if we really want to compare ourselves to the other members of the hominidae family, we should take a serious look at their lives as well. Doing this, we find them knuckling along the filthy earth, hurling feces and screaming unintelligibly at one another. This might often be followed up by a good chest-pounding, or perhaps even an old fashioned beat-down. Needless to say, humans are little different. Despite our marvelous intellect and incredible capacity for empathy, we resort to terrible violence no less often—nor is feces-throwing ever completely out of the question. All things considered, we might really be quite ordinary apes.

The things about this, however, is that we are so perfectly equipped to do better. It’s a matter of achieving one’s potential—the old, ubiquitous notion that one must be compelled not to do better than all the rest, but rather to simply do one’s personal best. Our cerebral-capacity alone affords us the potential to accomplish so much more than the others, and to shift beyond this base-violence into a far more gracious and well-mannered state of being. The promise we have is unbounded by anything save our imaginations, and this has been shown time and again—as numerous societies have risen to show the glory of mankind’s innate potential. But for every rise, there has been a fall, and we have proven consistently unable to maintain any serious ascension into the epoch of equality and dignity for which we are so well qualified. We may build great cathedrals, but we inevitably use them for the spread of greed and power rather than grace and mercy. We may write of utopian ideals or great societies, but we fall ever short of realizing them as we capitulate to the temptations of wealth and fame. Perhaps then, we may best be described as under-achieving apes.

Much of this question comes down to potential. There can be little doubt that we as humans have the theoretical potential to be the most inspiring and beautiful creatures to ever grace this earth. Our capacity for reason and problem-solving could allow us to truly be the promised stewards of the earth—watching over our hominidae brethren and all the other creatures with whom we share this wonderful planet. But where we may have spread equity and joy, we have sown only despair and intolerance. Where we may have acted as guides and care-takers to the planet we have left it barren and unstable. Finally, where we may have been exemplars of decency and righteousness, we have fallen ever to our own doubts and greed—wallowing in misery as we toil ceaselessly for more of what we want at the expense of what we really need. In truth, the homindae family and the world in general may have been far better off if humans had never climbed out of the trees from whence they came. In the end, I suppose, we really are pretty disappointing apes.

-Brad OH Inc.

Soirees and Solemnity in the Square

Posted on May 22, 2016 by Brad Oates

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

I sloshed along—weary, beaten, and soaked head to toe in Faygo. Heading back from the ICP show at the 2011 Bamboozle Festival in New Jersey, I’d taken the train to Penn Station, and was meandering, exhausted, back towards my hotel near Times Square. I barely took in my surroundings as I stumbled along; the adrenaline and unbridled joy of the event still had their hold on me. I mumbled familiar lyrics to myself, navigating slowly towards the Square.

The first thing I recall noticing was the crowd—significant even for Times Square. The hour was quite late after all—likely well into the early morning of May 2^nd, 2011. I paid little mind however, and continued on my way until I heard the chanting.

“USA, USA, USA!”

An ominous feeling took hold immediately. As it turned out, that feeling would take a long while to subside. Turning down an alley and passing out into the main square, I was met by an impenetrable wall of people chanting and singing. There were American flags as far as the eye could see. I stood with my jaw agape trying to sort out what was going on, when an errant crowd-surfer nearly took my head off.

‘Nice try,’ I thought—having spent the past few days stalking the Insane Clown Posse along their east coast tour, it would take more than a lone crowd-surfer to take me down. Still…none of this sat quite right with me.

Glancing eagerly about, I saw people climbing telephone poles to either hang flags or to improve their view. Men on benches read from bibles, and women held their children up to the open air. High-fives were exchanged, friends embraced, and a general feeling of unrestrainable patriotic glee pervaded the scene.

“What’s going on?” I recall asking a stranger.

“Obama’s dead!” he answered over his shoulder.

This news came as an even greater shock. Certainly, I recalled the controversy surrounding his presidency, but the festivities taking place around me seemed well overboard—or downright seditious—if based around a recently deceased president.

Still, the next person I asked gave me the same answer. And the next. It wasn’t until I approached a fourth stranger that I caught a glimpse of a familiar face on the giant Times Square screens. Dark skin in white wrappings, a long black beard—no one alive during the past ten years would mistake that face…and suddenly everything fell into place. Osama Bin Laden, not Barak Obama, had been killed.

Now the joy made a bit more sense, for a moment.

I turned around in awe, taking in the scene with a touch of morbid curiosity and a resounding knowledge that I was, at that very moment, witnessing history.

Everything continued as it had been. The songs were sung, the crowd-surfers surfed, and the flags were waved. For me though, the strange scene quickly lost its charm. Listening to the vitriol and barbaric revelling of the partiers, I couldn’t help but sympathize. Many were likely locals, who had been personally affected by the tragedy of 9/11. I was not.

It didn’t take long for me to decide against staying. Dancing for death had never been my forte—even when the death was so well-earned.

I dropped my soaked clothing at the hotel, changed quickly, and headed out for a quiet pint. Even that was hard to find. Most bars were filled with the overflow from the party in Times Square, and escaping the patriotic revelry seemed nigh impossible. After a tenacious search however, I found a tiny little corner of nowhere, ordered something dark, and sat in silence to reflect on the moment.

Beside me—and quite possibly the only other patron of the joint—sat a weathered old man. He stared morosely into his beer, his eyes never moving up.

I don’t remember how I started talking to him—although my interest in strangers is naturally increased when away from home—but eventually I asked him for his thoughts on the scene outside. He said he didn’t have many, and none worth sharing.

He was an old Marine, he explained. He’d no doubt seen plenty of death in his day. Perhaps he’d danced the same dance that raged now outside many times before—for victories far more personal. Or perhaps not. Just now, he wanted no part of it.

We sat for several hours—most of them in silence. He’d ask me now and then about my home, and what I did. What I believed. What I didn’t. He seldom answered the questions I turned back upon him.

When I finally left, I remember having no clue what I was feeling. Sure, I was fine with the death of a known killer and terrorist, but I didn’t feel any safer. I had no illusion that the world would be a better place now. More bombs would be dropped, and new leaders would rise on both sides—all intently seeking further death and destruction.

The people who fought the hardest for peace appeared to benefit from it the least, while those who hadn’t worked at all for it danced as only those who’ve never known loss or toil can. The people who proclaimed most fervently the superiority of their nations seemed to be the ones who’d never left its borders.

I suppose there are a lot of things like that in life. It’s easy to be enthusiastic when we are young and foolish and know no better. For the wise and weathered—for the warriors who have seen the cycle come back upon itself time and time again, there are no songs of joy or dirges of sorrow. There’s just another day, with nothing more to say.

Every year, I feel more like that old marine.

-Brad OH Inc.

When You Arrive

Posted on May 1, 2016 by Brad Oates

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

When you arrive,

My back will straighten,

My eyes will shine,

And pace will hasten.

When you arrive,

I’ll live once more,

Not for myself,

But to adore.

When you arrive,

I’ll build my home,

Which cannot stand,

For self alone.

When you arrive,

I’ll hear anew,

The sounds and songs,

That I once knew.

When you arrive,

I’ll play and laugh,

And drink deeply,

Of all I have.

When you arrive,

My fears will die,

When you arrive,

Then so shall I.

-Brad OH Inc.

Brad OH Inc.

Brad OH Inc. is the official website and blog of Brad Oates, author of ‘Edgar’s Worst Sunday’ and 'Meaning Less'.

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