Brad OH Inc. Among Legends

cropped-cropped-blogbanner13.jpgToday, we have an exclusive treat for all our fans. Below, you’ll witness photographic evidence of the good folks at Brad OH Inc. taking their rightful place among legends.

SAMSUNGDon’t forget to pick up your copy of ‘Between the Shelves: A Tribute to Libraries by Edmonton Writers‘ by clicking the image above.

-Brad OH Inc.

‘Soft Sell’

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

Green Desklamp

Another song/ poem from the intellectual property vaults of Brad OH Inc. Today, we present the lost ‘Basic Human Indecency’ song: ‘Soft Sell’.

 Soft Sell

 Cliché

Things have a way

Of working out

Touché

You’re proven wrong

Each time you doubt

It can end with a scream

You can leave with a smile

It may seem too early

Or too long a while

But the credits will roll

And again you know

You’re free to go

All the gifts you are offered

Are the ones you would shun

Given a soft bed and you choose to run

And you run until you feel your heart swell

And you’re thankful for that

Cause you earned it yourself

A gift with no nametag

You need the soft sell

Thought

You had it right

You’re off again

Taught

That time is short

It’s closing in

You will lose it until

You find it at last

Time takes so long

Then it’s gone so fast

Just reap and sew

On with the show

You’re free to go

You’re given a Father and Mother

But you want faith and a lover

So much fresh air and still you would smother

You ask for a friend when you have a brother

What you can hold is all that you’ll make

You’re given so much more than you can take

Still you’re feeling well

Can you even tell

You’ve got the soft sell

Love notes written

In folder creases

Cause big things happen

In tiny pieces

He moves the world

And you never feel it

Believe it

You’re free to go…

 -Brad OH Inc.

Will vs. When: In Defense of the Muses

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

Green DesklampToday, in continuing our celebration of the release of ‘Between the Shelves: A Tribute to Libraries by Edmonton Writers’, we are happy to share with you a submission from our former anthology, ‘Don’t Chew on the Sharp End of the Pencil’.

This anthology was released back in March of 2013, and much like ‘Between the Shelves’, was edited by Brad OH Inc. and Hal J. Friesen, and featured submissions by members of ‘Edmonton Writer’s Group’.

Below, you’ll find the Brad OH Inc. submission from ‘Don’t Chew on the Sharp End of the Pencil’ in its entirety. We hope you enjoy it, and don’t forget to pick up your copy of ‘Between the Shelves: A Tribute to Libraries by Edmonton Writers’ in either Kindle ($2.99), or Paperback ($12.50) copies. All proceeds are to be donated to the Edmonton Public Library System.

BetweenTheShelvesCoverWill vs. When: In Defense of the Muses

A Discussion on Timing your Productivity

-By Brad OH Inc.-

 In many ancient cultures, art was considered the work of divine inspiration, imparted unto chosen individuals by the muses. In some accounts they were daughters of Zeus and Mnemosyne—the goddess of memory. Some myths hold that there were three muses, while other accounts say nine. In some legends they are each given a separate artistic domain—ranging from poetry to tragedy, and even encompassing such arts as comedy, astrology, and dance.

I am not a historian, and cannot claim a comprehensive knowledge of the muses’ origins. All that I can say with certainty is that I have yet to meet a muse, and by this fact I am somewhat perturbed. They would be most useful for anyone in a position for which creativity is a prerequisite, and I can certainly imagine that if they existed—whether there were three or nine—all art would cease, as all artists began a bloody battle for possession of one.

When writing, I often feel there is a similar conflict being waged for my productivity. This conflict is recalled to me whenever I hear other writers planning their efforts—particularly when the discussion drifts towards overcoming the dreaded ‘writer’s block’. It is the battle of will versus when.

There are myriad opinions on the matter, for there are many different writers. It might be that the ‘will’—that indescribable drive to write which often settles upon us at the most inopportune times—is lacking. This inevitably leaves us throwing crinkled papers angrily across the room, cursing our lack of creativity before giving up entirely.

On the other side is the issue of ‘when’. Writing is a demanding occupation, and we are bombarded constantly with conflicting expectations which encroach on time that might otherwise be spent churning out vast tomes of flawless material.

This conflict happens to us all. Every writer finds themselves challenged by one of these constraints—if not both. Often enough, ‘will’ and ‘want’ will double team us—a sudden brilliant idea will strike us, and we know that as soon as we’re at our desks that this cathartic flash will become the breakthrough plot of our burgeoning career. That’s the setup.

But chores abound, and when finally we find ourselves seated in our office chair—that imagined place were high art flows from our pens like fountain pop at a child’s party—we find ourselves abandoned. The words don’t come, or worse, the idea is in hindsight pretentious or cliché. That’s the knockout punch.

Wherever you turn, you’ll find advice on the matter—and I remember trying it all. I’d sit at my desk for hours uncounted as the chair constricted around me. The blinding snowstorm of my blank screen burning my tired eyes as I’d reassure myself: You just have to sit and force it, dig deep and find where you’ve got it buried.

Nothing would come.

I’d sit until I was certain to develop bedsores, and finally push away in disgust—positive there had to be a better way.

Of course, this attempt at forced productivity was duly compensated for. Weeks would pass in an apathetic malaise—I’d tell myself I was recharging or that I needed to be in the right place to write. That place wouldn’t come either.

It made me wonder why I started to write. I certainly don’t remember sitting down with an empty word processor, thinking: This is the life. I’m not sure any writer ever has.

So how did I start to write then? In fact, I can’t recall now that I look back. What I am certain of is that it happened gradually, most likely as I came to realise that I had a lot I wanted to write about—and more important still—that I enjoyed doing so.

How do we as writers find ourselves at this impasse? Whether walking the streets reflecting moodily on our recent lack of productivity, or sitting with an empty sheet regretting our inability to find the words, we are constantly relegated into the unwilling pawns as our inspiration squares off with our discipline in a match which can end only with the death of our aspirations.

When writing is such a struggle, it can be a feat to remind ourselves that frustration is an integral aspect of any endeavor, and that no matter how it may try us, we write because we enjoy it.

Enter the muses—shy ladies, they come unlooked for—bringing a sudden smile as the words fall together in your mind. Like the building of a song, the bridge of some happenstance occurrence meets the chorus of obscure connections, until we are left awestruck by the crescendo of a promising plot.

It’s not something you can look for. That’s not how the muses operate. But I do know that when I sit at my desk calling for them, there is seldom an answer. Nor do I fare better playing hard to get, pushing them from my mind hoping they’ll sneak up from behind.

Rather, we must allow ourselves to receive these inspirations when they come, yet know where our efforts are best aimed when they do not. Being a writer is a surprisingly multi-faceted pursuit—editing, marketing, research, organization, plotting, learning—all of these and more are required to find success, but not all of them demand the attention of the muses.

Productivity may be achieved even when creativity lacks, yet we must be vigilant for creativity when it does arrive. In an age of limitless accessibility to technology, it’s easy to be prepared: phones, tablets, laptops, or even a good old fashioned notebook. When the call sounds, there’s little excuse not to answer. I’ve found many of my finest periods of productivity coming unexpectedly—one idea branches into many, and I eventually get home with a notebook brimming full of hasty scribbles to decipher.

These brief triumphs don’t end the battle. Perhaps it’s not the sort of battle which is meant to end. There will never be enough time, and what little does come up will still all too often be spent futilely. But if we remind ourselves why we write—what passion for wordplay or prose grew within us to foster this mad pursuit—and in so doing maintain a positive and open attitude towards our craft, then surely we’re on the right track.

It may be an offhand remark of a friend, an unexpected sight, a nagging question whose answer plays out in our minds, or just a whisper on the wind. However it comes though, we must be prepared. For the muses—rare and mysterious as they are—still speak in ancient tongues. It is up to the writers, and indeed all artists of the world, to be ready to translate them.

-Brad OH Inc.

‘Between the Shelves’ Kindle Version Available and Brian Clark Interview

cropped-cropped-blogbanner13.jpgToday, we’re happy to announce that the Brad OH Inc. and Hal J. Friesen edited Anthology ‘Between the Shelves: A Tribute to Libraries by Edmonton Writers’ is now available in both Kindle ($2.99) and Paperback ($12.50) copies at Amazon.com. All proceeds are to be donated to the Edmonton Public Library System.

BetweenTheShelvesCoverTo celebrate, we have an interview with Author Brian Clark, who appears in ‘Between the Shelves’.

This interview was conducted by Hal J. Friesen in anticipation of the anthology’s release:

Brian Clark first opened his eyes to the midsummer sun in the year the TV remote and Silly Putty made their debuts. Despite these distractions, he soon formed a lifelong affinity with libraries. It is now his pleasure to contribute to this collection of short stories. Over the years, he honed his storytelling skills by preparing letters for politicians. More recently, the newsletter of the Millwoods Seniors Activity Centre has published a number of his articles, where the opinions expressed are his own.

  1. How has your experience working with politicians impacted your writing?

BC: It taught me to avoid getting emotionally attached to the words I’ve written as they were always changed in some way.  I think this prepared me to embrace both self-editing and that of others.  I practiced writing in a way which gave the politician ‘plausible deniability’ if things didn’t turn out as expected, but could also be seen as a triumph if policies were popular.  With practice, hints and half-truths became stock devices.

  1. Is Becca (protagonist in the story) based on anyone in your life? 

BC: My daughter had a job at a library for a couple of years so that gave me an insight into the duties of a Page. She would sometimes tell me stories about children being left in library while a parent went to shop in the mall, forgetting the children. My daughter also maintains friendships with a couple of the other former Pages. In this story, I tried to work with stereotypes of a teenager, her parents and her boss and let that tell me how they respond to the circumstances they found themselves in.

  1. You often use music and lyrics as inspiration for your work. Can you describe the role that music plays in your writing and why it’s so important to you? 

BC: One of my skills, I think, is to mono-task so I don’t use background music. Music is either on or off. When it is on, I try to really listen to the piece.  Sometimes it’s just a mood I pick up on, at others it’s a few words from a verse. I don’t feel obliged to stick to the songwriter’s perceived intentions preferring instead to use the work as a diving board from which to launch my own thoughts. One of the roles of the arts in general is to look at life and distort it a little. For me, music is a reservoir of these refracted images.

  1. What is your educational background, and how do you think that has shaped you as a writer?  

BC: I left school a couple of weeks before my 16th birthday, but 18 years later I had accumulated the paper qualifications, maturity and money to go to University.  I left with some great memories and a degree in Cultural Studies.  I learned to research my work and to write to a deadline, but perhaps most important of all, I developed a curiosity.  In the last couple of years, I have completed 15 to 20 MOOCs [Massively Open Online Courses], including several on the history of rock ‘n’ roll. Life itself has been just as important as structured learning. I have lived on 4 Continents, although only briefly in Asia, collecting life lessons along the way. Jobs have included, hotdog vendor, Santa photographer and courier, most memorably delivering flowers on Valentines Day.  These experiences serve as a bank from which to withdraw both incidents and characters.

  1. Who has inspired you as a writer? 

BC: It sounds mushy, but my wife, Leny, and my daughter, Brenna have edited my life for longer than I can remember. They have not only given me the freedom to pursue whatever is in the air, but also encouraged me to do so. At the same time, they have gently curbed my excesses and prevented self-inflicted disasters. Their presence in my life remains inspiring.

Brian Clark’s story “The Turning of a Page” is featured in ‘Between the Shelves’, which you can purchase now on Amazon.

-Brad OH Inc.

“Between the Shelves”- Release and Interview with Brad OH Inc.

cropped-cropped-blogbanner13.jpgToday marks the official release of ‘Between the Shelves: A Tribute to Libraries by Edmonton Writers’, an anthology edited by Brad OH Inc. and Hal J. Friesen. This anthology is a collection of stories by writers from the ‘Edmonton Writer’s Group’, including one by Brad OH Inc. entitled ‘Neve Uncovers the Ultimate Truth of All things’.

The theme of this collection is our shared appreciation of libraries and all they offer to readers in Edmonton and beyond. The anthology is available now via CreateSpace in both digital ($2.99) and hard copy ($12.50) versions. All proceeds will be donated to the Edmonton Public Library System.

You can purchase your copy here:

BetweenTheShelvesCoverTo celebrate this release, we have an interview conducted by Hal J. Friesen with Brad OH Inc. about the content of the anthology.

  1. First things first: do you believe that people should be Corporations as well as vice versa?

That’s a great line of inquiry, and we here at Brad OH Inc. are thrilled to see your appreciation for such crucial issues. Really though, we think this may be two questions, and therefore we would be remiss to provide any less than two answers.

I’ll answer the second first, as it’s the easier answer. Let it be abundantly clear that the question of whether or not Corporations are people is no question at all: just ask Mitt Romeny! If you ignore the blathering after his key statement, we believe the point is made abundantly clear. But if you need it better articulated, you’ll find just that here.

Yes, there can be no doubt whatsoever that Corporations are not only people, but they are the very best of people. They are the creators and providers, they are the ones who inspire and build where others only talk and dream. This of course leads us to your other, more relevant question. Namely: Should people be Corporations?

This too is an easy answer—although again it requires some clarification…perhaps even a moderate touch of filibustering. Specifically, we need to discuss the word ‘should’. If we’re to take it in its proper sense, then we can say at the least that all people should endeavour to be Corporations, even if they will not all be able to achieve it. Obviously, people should strive to be their very best. Corporations are the best possible expression of humanity, and therefore we would encourage every person to strive to grow into a Corporate person. The benefits alone are outstanding: tax breaks, immortality, and utterly no risk from bankruptcy just to name a few.

Now, you may expect me to quote Ayn Rand here, but I’ll do you one better. In ‘The Republic’, Plato encourages a group of enlightened elites to lead the demos. What better expression of an enlightened elite than the Corporation? Our goals, clearly, are more evident and better pursued than the fickle worries of ordinary humans. That alone should suffice to illuminate the pressing need for Corporate leadership. Therefore, it behooves us here at Brad OH Inc. to encourage all basic people to aspire to greater accomplishments—namely, becoming Corporate. After all, an increase in Corporate presence is the highest hope for humanity…at least until we can achieve the end-goal of Corporate Suffrage.

  1. Have you or any members of Brad OH Inc ever had any embarrassing moments in a library? Any responses will be strictly off the record.

Here at Brad OH Inc., we hold ourselves to the highest possible standards of behaviour. Furthermore, we have a team of legal professionals on call at all times, ready to denounce responsibility for any perceived transgressions; so that clearly precludes the possibility of any officially acknowledged embarrassment.

With that out of the way, there is one incident we recall that may fit your need to publically deride the creative origins of our Corporate-Personhood. When we were just a young Corporate Human, we were reading aloud at a public library to a table of peers. Our chosen book was something about ‘Gnus’—those abominable animals that can’t quite decide what they are. The entire point of the book was that the word ‘Gnu’ sounds just like ‘new’ and ‘knew’, however this point was missed on our still developing phonetic-mandates. Therefore, we pronounced the word ‘Gnu’ as ‘Ga-noo’—entirely destroying the already limited humour of the book, and causing us significant lasting shame.

  1. Is Neve inspired by a member of Brad OH Inc?

Yes in fact, very astute of you to see this. There was a young girl we kept down in the copy room, from whom the name and likeness of the titular character are entirely derived. Have no fear however, the process was entirely by the books.

You see, Neve owned a small rat named Clarice, who one day managed to saw through one of the printer cables with its savage little teeth. Neve’s salary was insufficient to pay for the damages, and so, mercifully, we here at Brad OH Inc. appropriated her legal name and likeness, knowing well that we’d sooner or later find some way for it to pay off her debt. The story in this anthology is the fulfillment of that debt.

Neve has since been terminated.

  1. At what point in your own reading development did you move like Neve away from purely “happy” stories?

Looking back, we’d have to say that happened pretty early. Certainly, there were a number of happy-go-lucky stories read to us before we were officially granted our Corporate-Sovereignty, but even then, some our earliest official recollections involve having ‘The Hobbit’ and ‘The Lord of the Rings’ read aloud to us—and those are bitter-sweet at best.

If you’re at all familiar with our efforts—which you certainly should be—you’ll know that creation and meaning are imperative to the purposes of Brad OH Inc. To that end, we’ve found that simple, happy stories do little to address the questions so essential to the human/ Corporate experience. It’s through struggle that we grow…and heedless expansion is one of the key goals of Brad OH Inc. after all.

  1. Which Corporation has had the greatest inspiration on Brad OH Inc.’s mission statement?

That’s an interesting question. As far as our Corporate structure is concerned, we’ve worked hard to emulate all the greats: Enron, Lehman Brothers, JPMorgan Chase…all the essentials.

As far as our personal, creative goals, you probably already know that our Corporate Summary Statement is: ‘A thought conglomerate founded on the fundamental imperative of expounding erratically extreme philosophic tenets firmly grounded in hubristic narcissism.’ …it doesn’t get much more clear than that!

As for companies that inspire us on these grounds, the best example is probably Psychopathic Records. The self-founded label of the Insane Clown Posse, this label has succeeded not only in developing them from a tiny local rap act in metro-Detroit, to an international force to be reckoned with. Their dedication to the absurd has helped launch countless acts throughout their existence, and their passion for ethical-provocation and philosophical exploration is admirable. At Brad OH Inc., we hope to be as successful in providing such varied, yet philosophically consistent material.

Brad OH Inc.’s story “Neve Uncovers the Ultimate Truth of All Things” is featured in ‘Between the Shelves’, which you can purchase now on Amazon.

-Brad OH Inc.

“Between the Shelves: A Tribute to Libraries by Edmonton Writers”

cropped-cropped-blogbanner13.jpgToday, we’re happy to announce the impending release of a new anthology edited by Brad OH Inc. and Hal J. Friesen, ‘Between the Shelves: A Tribute to Libraries by Edmonton Writers’. This anthology, like our former release ‘Don’t Chew on the Sharp End of the Pencil’, is a collection of stories by writers from the ‘Edmonton Writer’s Group’, including one by Brad OH Inc.

BetweenTheShelvesCoverThe theme of this collection is our shared appreciation of libraries and all they offer to readers in Edmonton and beyond. The anthology will be available on March 14th via CreateSpace in both digital ($2.99) and hard copy ($12.50) versions. All proceeds will be donated to the Edmonton Public Library System.

Stay tuned to Brad OH Inc. for future updates on this release, as well as details on how to order your own copy!

-Brad Oates

‘Open and Close’

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

Green Desklamp

We’ve been getting some pretty great mileage out of our legal acquisition of the songs by former Edmonton band ‘Basic Human Indecency’, so naturally, we thought we’d continue with that trend.

Today’s song was the intended closer to the ‘Basic Human Indecency’ album that never was: ‘Open and Close’.

Open and Close

I’m not the first to sing this song

It’s been written for so long

To claim that we are strong

To admit when we are wrong

To wander when we’re lonely

I saw a star fall from the sky

There was no second try

You heard the last goodbye

Danced the rest out in a lie

And put it in a sad song

Another door slammed shut today

You watched her walk away

Thought what you would never say

Reason enough to pray

Once again you’ve lost your meaning

You make the sounds when you’re alone

The rushing crowd you’re on your own

You pick the pieces of your home

Out from the Gods that you have known

And say you do it for the last time…

-Brad OH Inc.

‘Overwhelmed’

Under the Green Desk Lamp…

Green Desklamp

Today, we have a special treat for all our fans here at Brad OH Inc. Through the savvy maneuverings of our legal department, we’ve come to be the sole owners of a number of songs by defunct Edmonton rock band ‘Basic Human Indecency’. Written by failed rock star Kai Konrad, these songs were never put to music, so really they’re little more than poems at this point—but that’s certainly not to say they’re without merit. We’ll be sharing these songs/ poems with you intermittently over the next few weeks. If there are any aspiring musicians perusing our site, feel free to use them in any way you like; just remember that sole legal ownership of these songs remains with Brad OH Inc.

Without further ado, we present to you today the intended lead single from the Basic Human Indecency album that never was: ‘Overwhelmed’.

Overwhelmed

I closed my eyes this morning

And tried to take it in

So many things around me now

All these images within

It’s like my world is crumbling

Glass marbles on the floor

Of a bigger world around it

And I’m waiting at the door

End of the beginning

Beginning of the end

Forget about your old sins now

There’s time to make amends

I remember thinking

That I knew it all

And I remember watching

All my foundations fall

Everyone is connected

In so many ways

And everything keeps changing

With the passing of the days

But nothings ever ending

The tape will always roll

And in the end all consequences’

Shall come to take their toll

They’re friends and enemies at once

And nobody can tell

They don’t have lies or self-deceit

Just a false pretense to sell

Their eyes flicker like candles

Bouncing between the walls

Anticipation in the heartbeat

And silence in the halls

With all the future waiting

A rumbling at the gate

Our minds all bent in circles now

And time will have to wait

Overwhelmed as I

Watch it all happen

Overwhelmed as I

Watch it all change

Overwhelmed cause I

Have no way to stop it

Overwhelmed cause I

Have no one to blame…

-Brad OH Inc.

Brad OH Inc.: Resolving Issues on Demand!

cropped-blogbanner1.jpgNow calm down. You haven’t gotten lost. We’ve redesigned the site a little, hoping to better meet the needs of our readers. One of the main motivations of this was to provide better access to the ‘Comment’ button, which you’ll now find represented by a speech-bubble directly to the right of the article title on the main blog page, or a text box at the bottom of the specific article page. You can use it right now to let us know what you think of the new look! This change is just a small example of our commitment to our dear readers, but that’s certainly not the full extent of it…

Here at Brad OH Inc., we’ve covered a lot of different topics over the years, and unquestionably solved a lot of important issues. With the ‘Under the Green Desk Lamp’ category, we’ve explored our deepest understandings of life and meaning through ‘The Metaphorical Imperative’, and also written a formal apology to our (potentially…) evil twin ‘Jeremy’.

The ‘Purely Speculation’ banner covers our exploration of all things political. Here, we’ve discussed the ‘Concept of Society’, and also did an in-depth expose on how current political trends have broader ‘Global Implications’.

Finally, our ‘Requisite Things’ topic has been used to forward our own Corporate agenda, with topics ranging from ‘Corporate Religion’ to the importance of ‘Corporate Security’.

That’s a pretty broad spread of topics we’ve put to rest, but what we here at Brad OH Inc. have been wondering is, what do you want? That’s right, today we’re reaching out to our readers, polling opinion to better understand what’s most in demand. Do you want to see more of any particular article type? Or maybe more of our ‘Single Serving Stories’? Well, for a limited time only, we’re open to your suggestions.

We have a lot of potential topics coming down the pipeline, along with some surprises totally unrelated. But being the caring and commercially motivated Corporation we are, we thought it only prudent to turn it over to you, our dear readers.

What type of article do you prefer? What key happenings would you like us to resolve for you and the rest of the world? If you have any general topic, or even a specific issue you’d like to see the infallible brain-trust at Brad OH Inc. elucidate, then leave your input in the comments via the link above. You never know…we just might answer!

-Brad OH Inc.

The Time for Giving

cropped-blogbanner1.jpgWell, this week marked the third Christmas that we here at Brad OH Inc. have had the privilege of sharing with you all. As we sat back and pondered what we might do this year for our reader’s, our ruminations turned inevitably to our first year, when we gave you all the heartfelt gift of nothing.

It was a fine gesture indeed. Hacking through the materialistic façade of Christmas and the infernal rat-race it breeds, we cut to the chase by pointing out that because the most ideal exchange of gifts should result in relatively equal satisfaction for all (in terms of the relevance and value of the presents given and received), the surest way of achieving that was to give each other nothing. So that’s what we gave you, and we’re certain you were as happy to receive it as we were to give it.

But two years have passed since then, and just as Bob Dylan predicted, times have changed. Nothing just won’t do. Now, we know that if there’s one thing necessary to choosing the right gift, it’s a deep understanding of the recipient. So we thought we’d look back and work on figuring out what to give you by considering exactly who you are.

Over the past couple of years, we’ve covered a lot of heavy topics together: we’ve discussed the misled ideal of Job Creation, the Religious Rights of Corporations, a study of Police Responsibility, the inspiring notion of Corporate Suffrage, a question of the Decay of Language, and so very much more.

Looking back, it’s easy to feel a little down about the prospects ahead of us. In fact, we’ve heard it said on more than one occasion that the writings of Brad OH Inc. have a tendency towards the pessimistic.

I have to admit, our little Corporate hearts grew a bit heavy trying to figure out a suitable Christmas gift with such a resounding sense of doom and gloom pervading the air. After all, what do you give to people who’ve seen it all? What desire can exist in a person without hope?

We were about to give up and fall back on the age-old tradition of re-gifting. Nothing worked before, surely it would do again. But no, that just didn’t feel right.

Then we got to examining that key assumption—is Brad OH Inc. truly such a negative place? If so, it’s certainly never been our intention. It’s not our goal to tell anyone how to think, or what to feel. In truth, we can assure you that you’ll find no answers here. We only raise questions and provide opinions.

Our utmost hope is to encourage others to speak out. The cretins that run this world are a depraved and savage lot. The best of them are blithering cowards, the worst…well, they’re far worse to say the least.

But if that’s all we thought of the world, there wouldn’t be much use writing about it. If the zeitgeist of the world is set in stone, then hammering away about it on a keyboard would be little more than propaganda. We at Brad OH Inc. take these issues on because they are worthy of consideration, and because our readers—past, present, and future—are the best equipped to take these causes as their own.

Behind the rage and vitriol so inherent to the writings here at Brad OH Inc., it must be understood that there is great hope. We write because the people of this world are better than they act, and it’s up to each of them—of you—individually to turn that trend around. We believe this is possible, and will continue tirelessly to encourage the process.

So, what to get? After thinking back on all these topics, we feel it fair to say at least that we know our readers, and thus the recipients of these gifts. Our readers are crude bastards, hopeful and naive fools, artists who believe that honest self-expression is the only true art, hippy freaks who long for a return of peace and love, frustrated ideologues who are too stupid or stubborn to give up. Our readers are the bright and shining nutcases who are mad enough to imagine that the world can be better, and brave enough to stand behind this ideal even when it seems like a lost dream.

Sadly, this does mean you’ll be getting nothing again.

But this year, it comes with a caveat. It’s not about fairness, or ideal gift-exchange circumstances. It is, very purposefully, an intentional reminder. You already have everything you need.

Just don’t forget to use it.

-Brad OH Inc.